Like jokes

I like my women how I like my bacon.

Well Dunn!!!

Sorry to hear you feel like poo!

Why don't nurses like giving old people baths or showers?

Because they don't want their vegetables to get soggy.

A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."

He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."

He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."

He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"

One day I went skating and skated for so long that my feet were incredibly sore.

It was like my skates were moving all by themselves, but I decided to just roll with the situation.

I like tacos more than you like tacos.

Who likes more tacos?

Mee! said the taco.

So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.

That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.

Mortar is like a woman's fanny; the more you play with it, the wetter it gets.

My tutor just said this quote of 2k18^^^

Pontypool is rough.

Whatever it is, I kind of like it.

I like tortles.

If you had a friend like me, would you kill me?

1, 2 you built like a dork.

3, 4 you got no girl, 4, 5 you're shorter than a remote.

You're so ugly, when you put makeup on, it makes you look like a clown.

Why do apple trees like emo kids?

Because they like to play yoyo with them.

The old cookoo master on the top of Mt. Qinshan told me this when I was eating sushi:

"The first bite tastes like heaven, the second takes you there."

😳

I was watching The Conjuring with an emo person. She said she likes the part where the girl was hanging. I said, "Why? Because you wish it were you?"

How can you tell it's a gay barbecue?

'Cause all the hot dogs taste like shit.

You look like you're playing hide-and-seek with your hairline.

Hey, I haven't been on for like 2 months. I don't know who is still on here or like if everyone left, but yuh, I just decided to come back. Hey.

Like (DYM 148).