Like jokes

Why do gay people like sports?

Because they get to play with balls.

Me: I found a group of furries in the woods.

Voice in back: Well, it looks like we're going huntin'.

I like my women like I like my chocolate.

Edible.

What's soft and feels like dog?

The fur coat I bought you from Temu.

Why is the Champs d'Elysees in Paris lined with trees?

Because German soldiers like marching in the shade!

I like my woman like I like my coffee: in a big sack on top of a donkey.

Why do vegetarians give anonymous blowjobs at the glory hole at an adult book store? Because they don't want anybody to find out that they like meat.

I like my women like I like my eggs. Beaten against a table until her insides come out.

I visited the 9/11 memorial, that was bomb just like the towers.

Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.

Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.

So, I am an emo dude, so I sit in the back of the class, and I talk to no one.

But one day this dude came up to me and tried to talk to me, so I just ignored him. Then he got really pissed off and said, "I'm gonna kill you." I was like, "You're gonna kill me just because I ignored you? Is your ego that big, wow?" He left. Then the next day he brought his goons with him and said, "Now you're dead." I ignored him again, and he said, "You will pay for this."

So the following day after school I was walking down the street back to my house. Then he and his goons tried to attack me, but then they died, so I kept on walking. I had some rope traps set.

This was the best day of my life.

This is why you never mess with emos. We have ropes everywhere.

Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.

Why does the Queen have more mobility than the King in chess?

Because it's shaped like the kitchen floor.

To start, I'm a big fella in size.

I saw a skinny guy act like Santa, so I went over to him. "You can't pull that off," I said. He said, "Then you try it." He gave me the Santa suit, and I dressed up. He walked by and saw me with 45 kids in line to sit on my lap and tell me what they wanted for Christmas.

99% of Roblox usernames be like: bdiejfbsie3hdiejdbisie882jeoxnd, by yYidgJyeuzyei73*-;ujduzjehzisjd, and j73heisbdjJd3nakwnwo2jdieneidjd.

One would think Dracula would have a lot of friends. Unfortunately, no one likes him. He is a pain in the neck.

Bro, why does Ohio look like Fallout 4?

Women are like iPhones, you have to touch them all over before they respond. Men are like Blackberrys, rub one ball and everything moves!

Why did the octopus cry?

Because his mum said he looked like Johnny Depp.

A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug," you are letting it slowly die.