Like jokes

Don’t you just wanna hang around, like Chester?

Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:

Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"

A girl walks up to her dad to ask for a dress for prom and he says, "Suck my dick and I'll buy you a dress." She does it and says to him, "Dad, your dick tastes like shit." And he says, "Yeah, your brother wanted a car."

If you don't like the video in 10 seconds, James Charles will sleep with you tonight.

A child with cancer: "I want to be like you when I grow up." Doctor: "Oh, you're not going to grow up."

I never liked unnatural adult stars with implants and face surgeries because they look photoshopped, and they always need a ton of lube to get into due to how plastic they are.

Miss Stephen likes kids like she likes wine: 15 years and in isolation.

Stories like Rudolph and Wonder show that different means worse.

What do gay men like to suck each other's bananas because they like the ice cream filling?

If you don't like racist people, isn't that discrimination?

Iran? More like tin can, cause we’re going to kick their teeth in, am I right?

Why can’t Kurt Cobain ride in the passenger seat?

Because he doesn’t like when someone calls "shotgun!"

Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it, it gets shorter.

you look like a dumb crab. When everyone sees you, the world will end.

The twin towers are like genders, there used to be two of them.

Why did orphans have to drink their own piss?

Because last time they went to the bar, they went with their dad and drank some Corona, then got drunk and started eating someone's toenails, so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody had to evacuate the bar. Then the orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world, so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to, so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldn't die and loved it. So then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking, so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on YouTube, and the boy became famous, so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk, then the little boy became really rich.

Hey, look, it's that "TRAINS gender" guy. He says, "I like trains." Uh oh!

How do you rape a girl?

By doing a tornado kick to your head since you stupid kids like rape jokes!

Rules of Dark humor:

1. All subject matter can be used, nothing is off limits.

2. No saying "Me" or "My Life" as a joke. Nobody finds those funny. We want actual good and meaningful jokes.

3. Don't Repeat Previously Posted Jokes. If you are saying the same joke that the person right before you posted you are just begging for attention and nobody by any means likes that.

I will add more in the future and be frequent on this site.

- Sincerely, Zane

What do you call a cat with two legs instead of four?

Dead and without use, that's what I feel like.