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Swing

Why did Sally fall off the swing? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.

Why did Sally drop a broom? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.

Why did Sally go swimming? She didn't like not having arms.

Knock knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally, she hasn't come back yet.

God

God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.

People of Earth: *running and screaming*

Santen: *to God* Really?

Hotdog

For some reason, my mom likes to lick and suck on hotdogs. As a son, can anyone tell me why?

Mango

What do you do when your man doesn't like fruit jokes?

Let the mango.

Skeleton

During Halloween, my friend went as a skeleton.

He refused to go into the haunted house. Looks like he was SPINE-LESS.

Party

At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, "That's the fourth time you've gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn't it embarrass you?"

"Why should it?" answered her spouse. "I keep telling them it's for you."

Orphan

Why do orphans like boomerangs more than their parents? The boomerang comes back.

One day I saw a kid cry, so I go, "Let's go find your parents." I miss my job at the orphanage.

Why do orphans get lost on boats? They can't find the home room.

Head

Your head is so big, it looks like traffic is able to fit on it!

Crush

Hailey: "Hey Brayden!"

Brayden: "Hey!"

*Music roles around*

*I tell Brayden Hailey likes him*

Brayden: "O_O"

Hailey: *Hides*

So sad </3 xD

Plane

The sexy towers are just like my sexy toes because when I crashed a plane into the tower, it burned and bled.

Kid

One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."

His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."

Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"

Forehead

Your favorite artist must be Rihanna, the way your forehead shines bright like a diamond!

Hairline

Seeing so many balding college students is so sad. Like, why the fuck is your hairline graduating before you?!?

Teeth

I've been drinking from a tall cup.

His teeth look like Twin Towers, Al-Qaeda blown him up.