Like jokes

Facial detection? More like racial detection.

Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.

The West is dying...just like the romance of an empire, especially the western part of the empire. Funny that, 'cause the East was going strong.

I like mangoes.

So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.

Your hairline is so far back you look like Frankenstein.

Did you know that chips taste like the baked potato in things called bags of chips?

Anakin Skywalker: I don't like sand.

*also him*

Anakin Skywalker: I lived on sand.

Why do orphans not like laptops?...

They don't have a homepage.

Why do orphans not like Family Guy? Because they have family.

What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.

What do orphans like to watch? Spider-Man: Homecoming.

I don't really understand 9/11 jokes, but they eventually hit me like a plane.

Why are Christmas trees banned at the mental hospital?

They would hang themselves like ornaments.

I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut, g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g”.

I don’t see why people say that emo kids don’t like to hangout. I seen them hanging all day.

A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"

A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "I’ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"

You're built like a double cheeseburger.

I bet you like men!

I am like mushrooms. Nobody likes me, but everybody tolerates me.