Life jokes
What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common?
That I will never get old.
My life is such an udder disappointment. What an udder failure!
My will to live.
The world's funniest joke? Your life.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby? The baby is still alive.
BOB: Wanna know a joke?
LILLY: What? Your hat?
BOB: No, my life :'(
I really hate waiting to die... It's taking a lifetime.
Q: The person who makes it doesn't say what it is.
The person who receives it doesn't know what it is.
The person who knows what it is doesn't want it.
What am I?
A: A baby.
Life has ups and downs, and they had downs.
My teacher gave us an assignment, and one of the questions was "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
I answered, "Happy."
The teacher said I didn't understand the test. I said to her that she didn't understand life.
People say that life is short.
I say... life is the longest thing we ever do.
Your life? Wanna hear a sadder one?
My life.
If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child?
The cancer patient asked the doctor how many more months he had to live. The doctor replied, "Tu-more."
Life is like giving head... it always sucks.
Q: Why did the teacher die?
A: Because he hated his life.
What do you do when life gives you lemons? Slit your wrist and give a lemon a twist. 🙂💊💉
All you need is a razor blade in life.
Jakob's life.
Please don't kill [me].