Life jokes
What's the difference between your mom and your dad? One leaves your life to go get milk, and the other cleans up after you, feeds you, and does your laundry.
Just walked in on my parents doing it! Worst 30 minutes of my life.
What's the difference between cancer and a baby?..
There is none.
Me and my life.
Apparently, I'm a category for jokes now. Hmm... ok!
#HOMIEZ4Life
P.S. Say "crack my finger," now say it backwards :)
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer. It never gets old.
What's the difference between the baby I just killed and Isaac Newton?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
Steven Hawking's death, you should've gotten a case.
I had the worst day of my life. My 13 year old ex got killed and I got fired from my job as a police guard. Did I mention that we were in Syria?
What's the difference between a pope/preacher and acne?
Acne comes on your face when you're 13.
What is it called if your mom does not make it to your birth?...
An abortion.
The joke is me.
Today I explain what things are fake: serial killers, clowns, Billy, fairies, your life, God, Jesus, your mom, and all your crappy fan-fictions about being saved from your even crappier life.
I'm also gonna explain real stuff: YouTube, your dad, scientists, teachers, God, Jesus, and Billy.
Stuff on both is real and fake depending on who you are. Your life IS fake. A lot of idiots will read this.
As a child, my mother always told me she was going horse riding. My whole life changed when I found out she was under the horse.
Want to hear a joke? I swear it isn't about my life again.
My mom and dad made a joke together and called it "yeetsu" (me)!
What's the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they're both too short.
What's the difference between a gun and my will to live? None, they are both absent.
I have a joke about death.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Think about it :)
If life was like Pacific Rim, I'd say your mom's pussy was a category 5.
My life, haha, so funny!