Legs Jokes

What animal has five legs? A pitbull returning from a playground.

A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.

What has 2 legs and loves to play with little kids? The local priest.

If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its cock

A blue silhouette of a person hanging on gymnastic rings is visible on the white wall of a gym. The text above says: "I made a deal with the devil. He took my legs, but I still think it was worth it."

A man wakes up in the hospital and says, "Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs!" "of course," the doctor says. "I amputated your arms"

What do you call an Indian with a wooden leg? Shit on a stick.

What do you call an Indian with two wooden legs? A waste of lumber.

Jack and Jill went up a hill

To pick some dill.

Jack slid down the hill and hurt his leg of skill,

And he needed a painkiller pill.

What does a serial killer make for breakfast?

Scrambled legs and toes.

Why do they tell actors to "break a leg"?

Because every play has a cast.

Good Evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the f*** out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb, to the point where it feels f***ing weird when I go and take a piss.

What do you call someone with one arm and no legs?

Names.

What do you call a girl with only one leg? Eileen What about an Asian girl with only one leg? Irene

I tried to pull (his/her) leg at the comedy club, but got arrested for sexual harassment. Does that still count as a joke? 🤣

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, “Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants.” The pirate says, “Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts.”