Leave jokes

My history teacher asked my class what time they would go back to just to see what happened.

I said I'd go back to Hitler's childhood to tell him the lies that he becomes the ruler of the world by starting the Nazis, and leave his death out of the discussion.

What did Pennywise become after LEAVING the circus? Ex-IT.

Americans leave without saying goodbye.

Russians say goodbye without leaving.

What's the difference between a child and a cancer diagnosis? At least the cancer grows up and leaves eventually.

What did the moose say after leaving the gay bar?

"Man, I blew 50 bucks in there."

Confucius say: "Gay man who take far, far away trip, hates to leave friends behind."

Why do orphans like cows?

Because when they leave, they bring back the milk.

What is red, orange, and yellow but doesn’t feel anything when it falls? Autumn leaves. 🍁

Me and my emo group were walking down to the tree and somebody yelled, "Don't leave me!"

My wife is so fat! When she goes swimming, she leaves a ring around the lake.

Your hairline goes so far back your dad didn't leave.

What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?

"Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"

"Watersharky, don't leave the site."

Okay, the time has come... I am finally leaving this website, so yeah.

I'm going to enjoy my life, so yeah.

I'm going to leave now, so bye.

"Hey, look at me, I'm stupid named Jordan C who won't shut up and leave Addison alone."

Akeld, just want you to know: Leave me and Gwen alone.

Real me.

Q: How would a chicken leave?

A: Through the exit.

STORY OF 2 PEOPLE NOT ME:

Girlfriend: What would you do if I won the lottery?

Boyfriend: I would take half and leave you.

Girlfriend: Ok cool. I won 12 dollars here's 6 and don't come back.

Imagine you ask a girl out in braille.

And she leaves you on felt.

Leaving for Disneyland! See you guys on Tuesday!