Leave jokes
There was an exam music quiz question about Gary Glitter. Now, if there's anyone you don't want to associate with the phrase "shh, turn over, you've got an hour," it's him.
Shit, my bad. I should leave him alone, he just wants to settle down and have kids.
The bell rings, and Ana was about to leave, but the teacher said, "The bell doesn't dismiss you, I do."
The next day, Ana was late, and the teacher asked, "Why are you late?" Ana replied with, "The bell doesn't tell me when I should arrive, I do."
The department of touch yourself is coming to the UK near you. I hope Scotland gets freedom. I can't wait to leave England and live in Scotland.
Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.
Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."
Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."
To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"
There are only women's rights causes because they leave you.
Memes
For Charlie D'Amelio fans, my basement is your home now. Leave a like if you agree with me.
My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.
Yo mama so fat, she went to the moon without leaving Earth.
Before you leave that marriage, remember that one innocent 🐐 goat was killed for your traditional marriage. 😔
Which one will fall from the tree first, the leaves or the emo?
The emo doesn't fall.
Your children grew up faster than it took you to leave for the milk.
Did you leave your hairline at the airplane, because it's going up?
Why did the emo kid leave the food on the table?
It was the Happy Meal.
How do you surprise a blind man?
Leave the plunger in the toilet.
(Kids Doing A Science Project.) Kid 1: Did you bring Uranus?
Kid 2: Never leave home without it.
Jordan, you stupid ass! Addison never bothered you so leave her the FUCK alone! How about this? Get up, go outside, stop being a jackass, and get a fucking life!
Why did the boy leave his chestnuts in the rain?
He wanted them rusted.
Why can’t you trust an emo kid?
'Cause they always leave you hanging.
Be grateful:
You're missing work today because in the past, someone cared enough to leave that banana peel on the stairs.
What's a similarity between Harvey Weinstein's pants and American bombs?
They both drop unannounced and leave mass casualties.