Law jokes
In some places in the world, you can't get an abortion even after rape. That's so fucked up.
You serve your time, you get out, and you STILL have to pay child support. What a nightmare.
What's the difference between Johnny Depp and Eminem? Eminem was never proven to beat his wife in court, but Johnny Depp was.
I say, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
It's okay, you had socks on :)
Why can’t Michael Jackson go within 500 meters of a school?
Because he’s dead.
I'm an orphan, so kidnap me.
Why do orphans like pedos? Because they have someone to call "daddy."
Police: Come with me, I’m taking you home.
Orphan: Well, we need to find them first.
Police: Then I don’t need to take you home.
Why does the orphan do robberies?
Because he wants to be wanted.
A cement mixer has collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals.
Why did the chiropractor go to jail? For not paying $75 in back taxes.
Our soon to be ex-Justice Minister is trying to distract us from his own misconduct charges by funding advocates for crime victims.
He should fund proctologists too because he'll likely need both after prison.
Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!
Why are handicap signs blue? Because they're all Crips. (sorry)
What does the handicapped man say to the cops when he’s mistaken for a criminal: "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed!"
These days, dating life is hard. You put yourself out there, and it's hard to find someone. The only thing to do is turn to family.
How do you make Prince Andrew sad? You tell him you're over 16.
What's up guys! Quandale Dingle here (RUUEHEHEHEHEHEEHE). I have been arrested for multiple crimes (AHHHHHHHHHHHHH) including: Battery on a police officer (WHAT), Grand theft, Declaring war on Italy, and public indecency (RUHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE x2 speed).
I will be escaping prison on, MARCH 28TH! After that I will take over the worl[d].
Why do orphans start fights?
Because they don't get in trouble at home.
Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!