Law jokes
I was listening to my children praying, and my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?"
I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings were born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother."
She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month, like the other ones that ran away.
You're so trash that when I dropped you off, I got a ticket for littering.
Why don't gay Greek men in Greece perform anilingus on each other?
Because anilingus between two gay men is against the law in Greece.
Why did the MOSFET go to jail?
It had a charge for battery.
What's the difference between a road bump and children crossing the road?
A road bump will make you slow down when you drive over it.
Why did the T-Rex 🦖 get a ticket?
He ran at a stomp light!
Why can’t orphans order from Costa?
They need a parent or guardian with them.
A broken pencil tried to break the laws of physics. It wasn't very sharp.
Why do heterosexual men and women that are married in France only perform anilingus on each other in their bedrooms?
Anal sex and oral sex is against the law in France.
Why did the pillow go to court?
Because it had a pillowcase!
It is now legal to bully an orphan.
What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Q: What’s a good thing about child molesters?
A: They drive slow through school zones.
Why can't antelopes get married?
Because they can't elope.
Kidnapping is just surprise adoption.
If a man kills a kid, it's called Murder.
If a woman kills a kid, it's called Reproductive Rights.
Why did the bee get into trouble?
Because he wasn't beehiving very well!
Police: Hey man, look at this! *throws cocaine at fan and it flew back into his face* Me: Are you okay? Police: Looks like I "crack"ed the case.
One day there was a guy who robbed a bank. A customer at the bank while it happened got the police. Who was that? The police said......
It’s a wood hulem.
A cop pulls over an old man.
The cop walks up to the old man and says, "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
The old man said, "No."
What to gift a child molester who already has everything? A bigger county with more believers.