Laughter jokes
What's black and screams?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron!
"Grandma, tell me a story!" I said as we huddled near the campfire.
"Alright," she said, "Once, there was a tree named Timmy, he was my best tree friend. I used to read books under him and climb all his branches."
"Where is Timmy now?" I asked.
Grandma pointed to the campfire.
There once were 3 men on an airplane and one bit into an apple and said, "This is disgusting!" and threw it out the window. The 2nd man bit into a banana and said, "This is rotten!" and he threw it out the window. The 3rd man bit into a bomb and screamed, "ALL MY TEETH FELL OUT!" and he threw it out the window.
Meanwhile, on the ground, a police officer was walking and he saw a kid crying and he went up to him and asked him why he was crying. He replied, "An apple came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head!" The police officer said, "That is weird," and kept on walking. Then he saw another kid crying and the police officer asked, "Why are you crying?" and he answered, "A banana came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head!" The officer said, "This has been a strange day." Then he sees a kid laughing and he asked why he was laughing and he said, while he was laughing, "My dad farted and the house blew up!"
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
They never get old.
My friend told me an emo joke once, and I said, "Emo jokes aren't funny, cut it out!"
Dirty Joke: A boy fell in the mud.
Clean Joke: He took a bath with bubbles.
Dirty Joke: Bubbles was the girl next door.
What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish?
"This tastes a little funny."
What do you do when you run out of lines on your book?
You look at the emo girl and say, "Hey, can I borrow your arm?"
I was an orphan as a kid, and I'm pretty sure my favorite thing was seeing parents with their kids.
I think we know why.
What game does an emo hate the most?
Life!
I feel sad because I went to an old man in a wheelchair while he was sitting next to a fire, and I screamed, "Hot Wheels!" 🤣
So I’m riding in the car with my dad and all of a sudden I smell something rank without warning.
My dad starts laughing at me.
Dad: “Son! That must have been an orphan fart! You know why?”
Me: “Why dad?”
Dad: “Because it ain’t got no pop!”
I don't know what to write here, just like...
Four gay guys are sitting in a Jacuzzi when all of a sudden, a condom starts floating. One of the gay guys turns around and asks, "Okay, who farted?"
Why is Santa always a b*tch, calling people names like, "Hoe, hoe, hoe?"
Me: Why am I an orphan?
Friend: I don't know.
Me: Ask your mom.
Orphan: *crying* You: Do you know where your parents are? Orphan: No. Your Friend: They don't have parents!!! You: 😂 I know.
What’s black and white and dead all over? My Chemical Romance.
Did you hear the one about the deaf person?
Me: No.
That's because they can't hear, so they don't talk.
Boobs are like friends: you have big ones, small ones, real ones, fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer.