Laughter jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bikini.
Bikini who?
Oh, that was just a bikini.
I was an orphan as a kid, and I'm pretty sure my favorite thing was seeing parents with their kids.
I think we know why.
Me: Why am I an orphan?
Friend: I don't know.
Me: Ask your mom.
What do you do when you run out of lines on your book?
You look at the emo girl and say, "Hey, can I borrow your arm?"
Why is Santa always a b*tch, calling people names like, "Hoe, hoe, hoe?"
What’s black and white and dead all over? My Chemical Romance.
I didn't trip and fall... I attacked the floor, and I believe I am winning :3
I'm dead! 😂💀💀
Why are school shooting jokes so funny?
Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup my slow tomatoes! 🍅😂
What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
It was Christmas time for Little Johnny. He was going to make some cookies and milk for Santa until he heard shaking and moaning from his mother's bedroom.
He thinks, "Meh, Dad's probably back from the grocery store."
But 2 seconds later, he heard a "Ho Ho Ho Oh YEAH!" and then a slap. He opens the door. He finds Santa riding on his 19-year-old mom. He asks, "Santa, when did you get here and WHAT are you doing?"
Santa replied, "Your mother asked for her 'milk jar' to be filled, and that's what I am doing."
Johnny says, "Oh. But, Mom, you told me Dad was here, well where is he?"
(Santa winks at you)
Cancer
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
What has eight legs and doesn’t rape children?
The Jackson 4.
Josh: Tell me something funny.
Mark: My life.
You want to hear a joke about pizza?
Sorry! Can't tell ya, it's too cheesy!
What do you get when you cross a stick and a dog? A run away joke...
I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!
I’d tell you a Chinese joke, but it’s wong.
What is a Russian joke?
Something that will be funny for Russian people.