roses are red violets are blue a face like yours belongs in the zoo but don’t you worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at you

How do you make a juggler laugh? YOU TICKLE HIS BALLS

three indans get captured by an enemy leader and the leaders says "go in the woods and find 10 fruits of the same kind.The first one comes back with apples.The enemy leader says "shove them up your butt and don’t make a sound or i will kill you.He get to two and yell.The leader killed him.He goes up to heaven.The second guy come back and has grapes he gets to 9 and laughes.The leader kills him.He goes to heavenThe first guy askes the second guy why did you laugh you had it in the bag.The second guy said he say the third guy carring pineapples.

A Japanese, Hispanic, and Iraqi man are in a plane. The Japanese man drops a bowl off of it, and shouts “I love my country!”, Then the Hispanic man drops a burrito off the side and shouts, “I love my country”, finally the Iraqi man drops a bomb, and shouts, “I love my country!”

Not much longer on, a man walks by a boy who is sitting by a crater laughing non-stop. And the man asks, “What’s so funny?” And the boy says “When I farted my house blew up!”

There once was 3 men on an airplane and one bit into an apple and said this is disgusting and threw it out the window the 2nd man bit into a banana and said this is rotten and he threw it out the window the 3rd man bit into a bomb and screamed " ALL MY TEETH FELL OUT" and he threw it out the window. Meanwhile, on the ground, a police officer was walking and he saw a kid crying and he went up to him and asked him why he was crying he replied an apple came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head! the police officer said that is weird and kept on walking. Then he saw another kid crying and the police officer asked why are you crying and he answered a banana came flying out of the sky and hit he on the head the officer said this has been a strange day. Then he says a kid laughing and he asked why he was laughing and he said while he was laughing my dad farted and the house blew up.

white people: come to America, meet natives and take food, kil them, rape them and enslave them natives: can y- white people: hey you remember all that horrible shit we did to you lets have a good laugh about it over dinner with your buddies and my new wives

You: Say “addicted” after everything I say. Person: Uh okay. You: When you’re obsessed with candy you are…? Person: Addicted. You: When you’re obsessed with drugs you are…? Person: Addicted. You: What hit you in the face last night? Person: Addicted… laughs (It’s supposed to sound like “A dick did”)

Se we are in class right, and the teacher has a metal leg. Every year she gets the question of “do metal detectors beep every time you walk by them?” She herd this question to the point were she just says yes without hesitation. Once she had said yes, two kids int he back started laughing. Teacher: Ok alright, take it a little bit more seriously would you? Kid: Oh were not laughing at that. Kid_2: Were laughing at cancer.

I was trying to make friends and this one person came up to me they said “lettuce be friends?” I just laughed and said that was tearable

Your mom laughs at your father, because he has an ugly wife.

How many times do you tickle an octopus to make it laugh? Ten-tickles.

When other people tell a joke; 3/3 people laugh. When I tell a joke; 1/3 people laugh, but 2/3 people stare into my soul.

one day a skeleton wasn’t laughing someone asked him why are you not laughing it turns out he fell and broke his bone, his funny bone that is.

Q. What breed of dog is supposed to laugh at all of your jokes

A. A Chihaha

Guys tell me that I have a MILF for a mom. So I told my mom that guys tell me that she a MILF. My mom said to me what is a MILF so I said Mother I’d Like TO F-ck. So my mom started to laugh and said well you do new a new step dad.

this is a big joke so yeah you cants tell me what to do this joke is funny so laugh ok… now that your done laughing lemme say a joke… get it there was no joke hahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahhahhaha lololol so funny im ninja

Molly Burke and her mom were on a walk, Molly walked into a bar, her mom laughed and walked under it.

A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an exposition to the Amazon Forest. After a while they get lost. So as they are walking suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says “Hey, your in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die.” The man from France said, “bring me the poison.” The man from Britain said, “bring me the gun” And the man from New York said, “bring me a gun as well!” The guy was confused but still brought it the items and gave it to them. The guy from France said, “for the France!” And drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “long live the queen!” And shot himself and died. And the man from New York started shotting and laughing like a mad man and said. 3 men lived through this and one said to the others, “Well…sh!# that didn’t go as planned.”

If you boil your funny bone it becomes a laughing stock.

If water makes you laugh then jokes make you pee

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