Last Jokes

I’ll never forget my Granddad’s last words to me just before he died. “Are you still holding the ladder?”

A teaher gives her kindergarden students four flavors of live savers and they have to guess the flavors the students guess cherry lime and orange. They dont know th last flavor. So the teacher gives them and hint and say its what your parents call each other. [honey] But a little girl shouts and says “ OMG there assholes.

I'll Never Forget My Grandfathers Last Words "STOP SHAKING THE LADDER YOU LITTLE CUNT!"

i saw a cuban prisoner i asked why are you running from the cops he said IM FREE AT LAST.

The last joke about the dad was a joke. Don't take it seriously. Can't believe that people actually think that was true

Last time i talked to my girlfriend, she was yelling at me to put the hammer down.

Last Night I had a dream I was swimming in lemonade... turns out I peed the bed.

Today is the day of 9/11 and we were in class making jokes and somebody said that’s sad and I was like why and they said “ today is the day the towers went down” and I said just like I did on you mum last night

I slept like a log last night.......woke up in the fireplace

There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac

What was the last thought Jesus had before he died?

"Man, I could really use a crowbar right about now."

I ran over neighbors cat last night and I just want to say... THAT THING WAS FAST! I had run a red light to get it!

Why are Japanese always so skinny?

Cause last time there was a fat man an entire city disappeared

I'll never forget my grandma's last words, "What are you doing in here with that hammer?"

Kat what I did a cat jump over the road because he believes he came flying in the clouds Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah Hah so funniest kitten kitten kitten kidding is my last time ofDo you Joooooooooooooooooooooookin

What did the egg say to the boiling water? It might take a while for me to get hard because I just got laid last night.

A kid walks in late to class, the teacher asks him "why are you late?" and he replies "I was busy throwing pebbles in the lake" Another kid walks in late to class and the teacher asks him "why are you late" and he replies "I was busy throwing pebbles in the lake", The last kid walks in and the teacher says "why are you late?...and why are you wet?" and the kid says back REMEBER MY NAME IS PEBBLES!!

A lady walks in to a dentists office, sits on the counter and spreads her legs. The dentist says i think you have the wrong idea with that the lady replies; last week you gave my husband his false teeth now you can get them out