What's an old Japanese mans last words
hey that cloud looks like a mushroom or is it just me
imagine this senario: a doctor walks in and tells the patient that he has all the illnesses in the world like this: "you have depression, diarrhea, cancer,... etc" and then the last one on the list is that he is deaf.
i will never forget my little brothers last word rip.
his last words: paint dosent taste good
Bank owner:if you want to start a bank account, I need ur name. Guy:Robin Bank owner: ur last name? Guy:Debank Bank owner: Robin Debank? Guy: put your hands up and give me all the money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know you don't like me, and that implies you need better taste.
I'm no an astronomer, but I'm pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.
I'd give you a nasty look, but it seems like you've already got one.
Your birth certificate should be rewritten as a letter of apology
You haven't changed since the last time I saw you. You really should.
An old man gets the call from the IRS The man on the phone says, “we’ve noticed large sums of money coming in and going out of your account constantly and we gotta get this straight. Come in tomorrow and we’ll have a chat about this.” The old man thinks for a while and then decides he better get his lawyer to come with him.
The next day the old man and his lawyer show up to the IRS office and the man there says,”So we’ve noticed these large sums of money entering and leaving your account nonstop. Can you explain this?” The man replies,”Well, I will bet on pretty much anything. Like this! I bet you 10,000 I can bite my own eye.” The agent takes the bet, and the man takes out his glass eye and bites it. He then says,”Wait. I’ll give you a chance to earn your money back, and more! I bet you 20,000 I can bite my other eye.” The agent thinks a minute and realizing the man isn’t blind, takes the bet. The old man takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye. He then says,”alright last chance. I bet you 50,000 i can stand on this side of your office and pee into that wastebasket on the opposite side without getting a drop anywhere in between.” The agent thinks real hard but decides it’s impossible so takes the bet. The man unzips his pants and pees all over the IRS agents desk. The agent jumps up and down and says, “haha! I got you now!” But the mans lawyer goes pale in the face, sinks his head in his hands and says,”He bet me 100,000 on the way over here that he could piss all over your desk and you’d just love it!”
A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis, her mom said you should have asked me last night it was at the tip of my tongue.
When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug. His last wish was to be Frank in Stein.
Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
Why can’t you tell jfk facts about Dallas
Last time he was their he got his mind blown.
me: the last time I used DUOLINGO was WHEN THE DINOSAURS WENT EXTINCT.
duolingo: lemme send my twins 2 go 2 ur houze (I got sideways8 twins)
Your so short, when it rains your the last one to know
You are so fat that the last time you stepped on the weighing scale the doctor said I want your weight and not phone number
Last post for today, but I had to say one more thing!!! Tomorrow I am going to six flags, and I am literally so excited! It is going to be so much fun. Hope you guys have a good MLK JR day!!!!!! Woohooo!!!!
What were the astronauts' last word before the shuttle blew up? what does this button do....
What's the difference between a chinese person with an old person? One lasts long and another doesn't
I met a gay guy last night Man was he a pain in the ass
My Crandall just be smashing more than u ON DA GIRlS and he was slapping yo girl last night harder the WILL at the OSCARS! ;)
2 magicians were in a competition the first one did magic and the second started counting down 3 2 but before he said the last number he 1
yo mama so fat the last time she 90210 was on a scale
