Are you in the alphabet 'cause I wanna give you the D.
Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
Why is the B so cool? Because it’s in between A and C.
I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win--however, no pun in ten did.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Robin.
Robin who?
Robin you, that is who.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Esteban.
Esteban who?
If you do not open the door, Esteban you!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A murderer.
A murderer who--
Is cut off by being murdered.
what do u call a mosquito in your language we dont call them the they just come and bight
i asked a chinese girl for her number, she said "sex, sex, sex! free sex tonight" i said, "wow!" then her friend said, "she means 666-3629
A dyslexic man walked into a bra.
"Immobile" means "I'm mobile" in my books.
A Mexican magician said he would disappear on the count of three. He said, "Uno, dos," and disappeared without a tres!
What did Saturday say on the day before Friday?
I’m thursty (Thursday).
What do you call a Mexican midget?
A paragraph, because he's not a full essay.
Justin: Hey.
Josh: Hey man.
Justin: Why only "man"?
Josh: It feels weird saying the r a c e y names.
Justin: I don't mind.
Josh: Okay, S L A V E.
Justin: Oh no, not T H A T one!
Trying to make a baby talk is like trying to negotiate with North Korea.
What did the American say to the russian?? Why u always russian
You want to hear some marriage jokes?
Don't worry, it's just a couple.
I'm sorry for all the fish puns. I feel so GILL-ty.
My friends say they don’t like my skeleton puns.
I should put a little more backbone into them.
