My friend entered a pun contest. He entered ten, figuring at least one of them would win, but no pun in ten did.
Language Jokes
Say "invented" without the first "n".
How many beans are there in Irish chili?
Answer: 239
Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine?
Answer: (spoken in Irish Brogues) Because if you add one more, it'd be "two farty."
Why did the 2 4s skip lunch? They already 8! Jahshshs.
And how did the pirate know that she saw land? She was shore of it! If u get it leave a like. Hahahahaha and which thing was heavier, a feather or steal? It's they way the same amount 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 Lol like
What is a gay person’s favorite book?
The dictionary.
What do you call a Spanish toilet?
Elton John.
What do you call a dead polar bear?
Anything, they can't hear you!
Knock Knock! Who's there? Candace Candace who? Can deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Do midgets still start their childhood stories off with, "When I was little"?
What language do billboards speak?
Sign language.
What do you call an idiot?
An absolute imbecile.
What do you call 2 wings and a halo?
A Chinese phone call: "Wing wing halo!" 🤪
Bully: I can't understand you because I don't speak ugly language.
Me: And I don't speak idiot language.
"So what, ah, my G?"
Who was in Paris?
I dunno, the title was censored.
Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?
That one friend: 11 - T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.
I know 25 letters of the alphabet, but I don't know why.
My "friend" has dyslexia.
"My name is Dezz."
Corpses aren’t funny—they’re dead serious.