A single sentence walks into a bar.
Knock knock. Who's there? Bear. Bear who? Bear bum!
What did the sushi say to the bee?
"Wasuuubi!"
"Herro, I cannot see my eyes."
What did the skeleton say before dinner? "Bone appetit." His whole family found that humerus.
What do you call a person with only one arm?
Half-assed.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 was a 6 offender.
What do you call a bitch? A dumbass, hahahahaha.
Do no doctor start with A and A+?
What do you call a bitch?
You call it a female dog.
What do you call a patronizing criminal walking down the stairs?
A condescending con descending.
Q: What do you call it when four Mexicans drown in quicksand?
A: Cuatro Cinco.
Why is 1026 afraid of 1028?
Because 1028 1029.
"BU" is the element of a surprise. Boo!
Puns, that's how I roll.
Why is 8 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 ate 9.
Fuck off!
Back in Australia, my puns are high koala-tea!
I was talking to my Welsh friend the other day, and he suddenly started talking Welsh to me then collapsed after the first few sentences. Turns out he had a stroke.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!