Language jokes
What do you call a bitch? A dumbass, hahahahaha.
Do no doctor start with A and A+?
What do you call a bitch?
You call it a female dog.
What do you call a patronizing criminal walking down the stairs?
A condescending con descending.
Q: What do you call it when four Mexicans drown in quicksand?
A: Cuatro Cinco.
Why is 1026 afraid of 1028?
Because 1028 1029.
"BU" is the element of a surprise. Boo!
Puns, that's how I roll.
Why is 8 afraid of 7?
'Cause 7 ate 9.
Fuck off!
Back in Australia, my puns are high koala-tea!
I was talking to my Welsh friend the other day, and he suddenly started talking Welsh to me then collapsed after the first few sentences. Turns out he had a stroke.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!
What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
Max's joke is literally a joke.
Grammar: It's the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A.
A who?
A-bless you!
I picked up a document, and I started to feel cold.
I looked down at the document, and it read "DRAFT."
Two cats called "1,2,3" & "un, deux, trois" had a swimming race across the channel.
1,2,3 cat won because un, deux, trois cat sank!