Kind of jokes
I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa.
As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of sick fuck does that?
What kind of videos can't orphans watch?
Family-friendly content.
What is an angel's favorite kind of tortilla chip dip?
GuacaHOLY!
What kind of veggie is always getting itself into a hard situation?
A pickle.
What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.
Memes
Q: What kind of Christmas music do elves like?
A: “Wrap” music.
What kind of ankle are you? A broken ankle.
What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?
A pedo-file.
Me: Sorry I couldn’t make it to school yesterday, I had an appointment.
Teacher: What kind of appointment?
Me: I had an appointment with a cut day. 😈😈😈
True story.
One time my friend nutted into my bag of trail mix.
I guess you could say I fucking ate a different kind of nut.
What’s the best kind of candy to offer at a Pride parade?
Skittles.
What kind of streets do ghosts haunt?
Dead ends.
What kind of truck does a Mexican drive?
F-Juan Fifty.
Girl: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles, and lighten your burden."
Boy: "It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles."
Girl: "Well, that's because we aren't married yet!"
What kind of shit does a ghost take every time? A spooky dookie!
What's a woodpecker's favorite kind of jokes?
Knock knock ones.
What kind of candy do astronauts eat in space?
Mars bars.
What do you call the United States of America under a Joe Biden presidency?
Answer: The Democratic People’s Socialist States of America. We're still America, just a different kind of America. And that’s no joke. 😔
Schools in the hood are kind of the same thing. I always seem to get shot.
What kind of jokes doesn’t work out?
Fat people jokes.