
Kind of jokes
What kind of jeans do you wear to church?
Holy jeans!
Man: I must confess, Father.
Priest: What are you here to confess?
Man: I hit my wife and blamed her for what happened to our son.
Priest: And what happened to your son?
Man: He said a man raped him.
Priest: When and where did this happen?
Man: A local church. I don't know which one.
Priest: ...By whom?
Man: A priest, he said. He said the priest had black hair and blue eyes, kind of like you.
Priest: ...Shit
I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa.
As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of sick fuck does that?
What kind of mask are you wearing?
An Elon Musk!
What kind of videos can't orphans watch?
Family-friendly content.
What kind of veggie is always getting itself into a hard situation?
A pickle.
Q: What kind of Christmas music do elves like?
A: “Wrap” music.
What kind of ankle are you? A broken ankle.
What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.
What is an angel's favorite kind of tortilla chip dip?
GuacaHOLY!
What kind of paper towel do they use in special education classrooms?
Downey.
What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?
A pedo-file.
Me: Sorry I couldn’t make it to school yesterday, I had an appointment.
Teacher: What kind of appointment?
Me: I had an appointment with a cut day. 😈😈😈
True story.
What kind of motorcycle do women ride? A menstrual cycle.
One time my friend nutted into my bag of trail mix.
I guess you could say I fucking ate a different kind of nut.
What’s the best kind of candy to offer at a Pride parade?
Skittles.
What kind of trumpet are you playing?
An "Donald Trumpet"!
What kind of truck does a Mexican drive?
F-Juan Fifty.
What kind of streets do ghosts haunt?
Dead ends.
I'm always forgetting these kinds of jokes. I also forgot my son's name.
