Kill jokes
Wayne Couzens, the police officer who killed Sarah Everard, has been complaining about receiving a whole life tariff for her murder...
I think he should count his blessings. He could have had it worse...
He could have married her!
Why is Delta jealous?
Because Omicron took the final kill.
"Fuck off for I killed him, bum bum."
Why did Kenny die?
Was he trying to kill himself? Was he just dicking around?
You know who deserves a medal? The guy who killed Hitler.
cats
Why are planes the most dangerous killers?
Because they killed 2,996 people in 10-25 minutes.
How do you make a mime cry?
You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.
"I will kill you with knife and gun, get ready, Explain Bear, stupid f***."
Yo mama so fat, she costs 15 elixir, and 3 inferno towers can't kill her!
I can't decide which side to take on abortion; on one hand it kills babies and on the other it gives women a choice...
Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.
Yo mama so ugly even bullets refuse to kill her.
My dad killed himself because he was Hitler.
“Wanna smoke, kids?” is an offer to do drugs.
“Wanna smoke kids?” is an offer to kill.
Katsuki Bakugou went into a bar and said: "Where is that damn nerd?!?". Everyone was confused.
Bakugou says: "Tell me where Deku is or I'll kill you!" He kills them all because they all have green hair.
What job lets you kill the most people?
An abortion doctor.
When a fat person wants to kill themselves, why are they so worried? The diabetes will get to them sooner or later!
Don’t kill the Earth, it’s the only one with beer.
You will never see a redneck opposing a war.
He will instead say, "Wait, I get to kill people and it's not illegal? And they're foreigners?"
Mom says: "I will go kill myself."
Me: *stays quiet cuz knows better than to talk* *also me internally eyerolls*
Some time later me fighting with my mom:
Me to my mom: "Oh, yea than kill me!"
Mom: "What the hell did you just say? I don't want to hear it from you again!"
Lesson?
So it's OK for adults to say "I'll kill myself" but not teens/kids!?!?