Kid jokes
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and kids?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
Why did the emo kid get mad?
I wore a “Just Do It” shirt.
Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.
Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some mairawanah.
Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "I know you wanna," but dumb-ass Jill forgot her pills, and now they have 12 kids.
What's the difference between me and a depressed kid? At least I'm out of the grave.
Kid !: What are you doin? Kid 2: Laying in my bed! Kid 1: Naked? Kid 2: Yes Ld 1: Show me! Kid 2: Its dark! Kid 1: Still show me! Kid 2 Ok-
Stephen Hawking walks into a bar, just kidding.
What's the difference between three dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't own a Ferrari.
I was playing Fortnite with a kid, then I heard their emo sister in the background, and it sounded like they were playing Fortnite, too, with the pistol shot and all.
What did the make-a-wish kid say to the staff? "I don't wanna go to Disneyland, I wanna live longer."
Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football?
Because he got all the downs.
Parents are like food—not all kids get them.
Why couldn’t the kid play baseball? Because he couldn’t find home.
I asked the orphan kid if his mom is hot. He just started crying.
Q: What happens to KID who NAPs near a stranger?
A: He gets KID-NAPPED (kidnapped).
Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.
What is a show for kids?
Barney.
My friend's mother thought a kid who had autism and Down syndrome called him a "double down."
There's a kid with loads of new firemen equipment and sees a fire engine go past and the kid asks the firemen, "Come have a look at my new gear." So the firemen go look at his gear, so then the kid says:
"I've got a helmet, a big jacket, and an oxygen tank, and a little wheelbarrow for my gear."
Firemen say: "Why is there a rope tied around a cat's balls?"
The kid says, "So I can have a siren nnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn"
Get off of here, kids!
What is similar between a ton of kids and some boxes?
Both of those are commonly found in basements.