Kid jokes
Why are emo kids the best jumpers?
Because they never fall down.
Every second, 1 kid gets diagnosed with homework.
Why is Hugh's mum so fucking fat?
Because she ate the 34 other kids she had but now only has 6,789.
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
I did a walk today and had fun. Today, I did not have to go get my kids and get to my new house. 🏠 It was a good day. I had fun. I did a walk today. I had fun today, but I’m going to be at the car 🚘 when I’m at my car. 🚘 What time was your night time? What time did [you go to bed]?
Why did the little kid cry? His dad forgot to pull out.
What do you call an asian kid who's bad at math?
An orphan.
How do you think they found out cows produce milk?
Two kids having fun in the barn.
What do you call your kids?
I bet the emo kids are jealous when they go to a funeral.
I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.
Dad goat: Son, do you know what I like to eat?
Son goat: No, what?
Dad goat: Goat meat.
Son goat: *Gasps*
Dad goat: Nah, I'm just KIDing.
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
Why do emo kids love dressing up on Halloween so much?
It's their last holiday for them, but at least they're still hanging on...
A kid got a bike and a soccer ball for Christmas. He was still unhappy.
Why?
The kid had no legs.
Kid: "THERE'S A SHOOTER IN THE BUILDING!"
Shooter: "Oops."
Kid: Wanna hear a joke?
Me: Sure.
Kid: Why diddncjcjcbfjcbcjdbbskzmzj b b j no?
Me:?
What do Special Ed kids and fast kids have in common? They like to do things sped up.
Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.
Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.
Kid 1: Aw, thanks!
Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10
Why did KFC take orphan?
Because kids fattening center.