Joke jokes

If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?

Sorry guys, I tried. I tried harder this time. I'll try again. Sorry, I can't delete things.

How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? More than 40 because my basement is still dark.

Why did the chicken not cross the road?

Because it saw your face!

Me: That’s a good WAVE.

Friend: I SEA it.

Wave: Doesn't break for us to surf on.

Me: I was SHORE it would be good.

Friend: I SEA what you did there.

I wish I could tell you about my penis, but it's too short.

I am the joke.

What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.

Stephen Hawking couldn't take the stairway to Heaven, he had to take the lift.

What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini?

I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

Why did the bike fall over?

'Cause it was wheely tired.

What were Stephen Hawking's last words?

Error.

How do you make a dead baby float?

Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!

Wanna hear a joke? Me.

Anong tawag sa cake na may ubo?

Edi cough cake! NYHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAKAJAHA LT TLGA BOSIT

Your hairline goes so far back, your forehead got a six pack.

Friend: You are joking.

Me: Joking on deez nuts.

Why can't a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw you will be born soon.

Well, if Stephen Hawking likes black holes so much, why did he call security when I put my hole on his face?

I am curious how many likes this will get.

LIKE IT!!!!!

What did the 3-year-old boy say to the priest?

"My bum hurts."