Joke jokes
Why did the carrots laugh?
They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.
Have you heard about the awesome fruit race?
The lettuce was ahead, but the tomato was able to ketchup!
Why did Leah throw the butter out of the window? To see a butterfly!
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
What's the hardest part about sex with a Thai girl?
Her, probably.
Dad, I'm hungry.
Hi, hungry, I'm Dad! 👋🍪🍩🍬🌮🍔🍗🍟🍤🍉🍭🍫🍰
Hi, how are you? Are you good?
What does one piece of toilet paper say to the other?
"I'm wiped!"
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error.
Why did the bike fall over?
'Cause it was wheely tired.
How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!
What's the difference between a Mexican and a book?
The book has papers.
Stephen Hawking couldn't take the stairway to Heaven, he had to take the lift.
What’s the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.
So Steph Curry and Lebron James went on a vacation, and Steph Curry said, "Try not to travel!"
I was about to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.
“Did you show him the pictures of our cats?”
“Yes.”
“Did you hang ‘em?”
What do you call a hot Mac Book Pro?
A Mac Daddy Pro.
Why couldn’t little Susie stay on the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Not Susie.