Joke jokes
My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight.
I told her to keep her chins up.
What is the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
Yo papa's wife is so dumb and fat that we had to use yo papa.
Whoever kills Hitler goes to heaven.
Oh, wait... never mind...
What is the name of Hellen Keller's dog?
NYAHHH NYAHH NYUUUU NYAAHHHAADUUDU!
What did the Titanic say as it sank?
I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!
The ball kept getting bigger and bigger...
And then it hit me.
You know what's the difference between my basement and Chick-fil-A?
A lot of things.
It's not a joke.
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*
Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"
Your hair and your hairline must be best friends, 'cause they go waaaaay back!
What do you call a paraplegic cannibal?
"Dine and dash."
When an orphan takes a family photo, it's called a selfie.
Where do terrorists go for food? The Allah snack bar.
Why did Al Qaeda lose $100 on a bet?
They bet $100 that they wouldn't crash when they went through the Twin Towers.
Yo mama is so ugly, her pictures hang themselves.
What does WTC stand for?
"What Trade Centre?"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because she wanted to have an affair with the rooster.
Hey, you there, were you raised on a chicken farm? 'Cause you really know how to raise a cock!