Joke

Joke jokes

Helen Keller

Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*

Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"

Hairline

Your hair and your hairline must be best friends, 'cause they go waaaaay back!

Bet

Why did Al Qaeda lose $100 on a bet?

They bet $100 that they wouldn't crash when they went through the Twin Towers.

Chicken

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because she wanted to have an affair with the rooster.

Cock

Hey, you there, were you raised on a chicken farm? 'Cause you really know how to raise a cock!

Life

Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.

Bar

Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

Be smart, not stupid.

Mom

Yo mom's so old, she went into the museum and walked out with a raise.

Type

I never make that type of joke. They always seem to crash and burn.