Joke jokes
I have some jokes about popcorn.
Nah, they're too corny.
Wanna hear a joke?
Yeah.
...
What's the joke?
I said it already!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Candace. Candace who? Candace be true, you don’t remember me?
I asked my sister to say something.
She said, "No."
That's what I like to hear.
Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry?
Well, they aren't.
Why?
They aren't repeated customers.
Friend A: Do you like Wendy's?
Friend B: Yes, why?
Friend A: Wen-dez nuts in your mouth!
What did the farmer say to the doll?
You death baby doll.
Another joke, I know they suck.
What is a depressed person's favorite joke? Their life.
I would make a joke about fat people, but they already have enough on their plate.
What do you call a blond with half a brain? Gifted.
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?
Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
What do you call someone who makes a joke about Bread society?
The Doughker.
Q: What did the late cannibal get when he got to the party?
A: A cold shoulder.
Me: You have terrible jokes.
Mum: Shows me a mirror.
My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight.
I told her to keep her chins up.
What is the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
Yo papa's wife is so dumb and fat that we had to use yo papa.
Whoever kills Hitler goes to heaven.
Oh, wait... never mind...
What is the name of Hellen Keller's dog?
NYAHHH NYAHH NYUUUU NYAAHHHAADUUDU!
What did the Titanic say as it sank?
I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!