Joke jokes
Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?
Me: I Excel at it.
Boss: Was that a Microsoft pun?
Me: Word.
Why does the orphan have water with its cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk.
Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police... Who? It's the police, let me in so I can get some donuts!
Friend A: Do you like Wendy's?
Friend B: Yes, why?
Friend A: Wen-dez nuts in your mouth!
What's the difference between a mother and a father? The mother always comes back from the shop.
I would make a joke about fat people, but they already have enough on their plate.
Your hairline so far back, it's a wide receiver for the Minnesota Vikings.
What's the difference between 5% of priests and 5% of atheists?
5% of atheists have seen a ghost.
5% of priests have spooked altar boys in the sacristy.
Why don't orphans get dad jokes?
Because they don't have a dad to tell them.
What did the farmer say to the doll?
You death baby doll.
Another joke, I know they suck.
What is a depressed person's favorite joke? Their life.
What do you call a blond with half a brain? Gifted.
What do you call someone who makes a joke about Bread society?
The Doughker.
Q: I like elephants.
A: Everything else is irrelephant.
The boys joking be like:
One guy: "Balls!"
All the other guys: "Hahahahaha!"
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?
Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
Q: What did the late cannibal get when he got to the party?
A: A cold shoulder.
What comes in and comes out, but you should never miss it?
Any ideas?
SHIT!!!!
What does an emo kid say to his best friend?
"Let's hang out."
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:
"You need to park a little closer."