Joke jokes
How do you get an emo down from a tree?
Cut the rope!
Why could not the 11 year old watch the pirate movie?
because it was rated RRRRGGGG.
I am guessing you don't understand :(
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
I forgot what a boomerang was. Oh well, it’ll come back to me.
My wife and I have made a difficult choice and have decided we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details, and we can drop them off tomorrow.
I don't like calculator jokes because they are too overused.
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he wanted to get to the other side.
What do you call a kid with 15 nukes and a shotgun?
The final countdown.
Your forehead is so big it makes Megamind's head look small.
Say "eye," smell "map," say "ness."
(I am a penis!) HA HA!
What do you say when an emo cuts themself?
"Like your cut, G."
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Interrupting cow." "Interrupting cow wh-" "MOO!"
How do rabbits travel?
By hareplane.
How do you call a cute door?
A-door-able.
I'm not saying you're stupid.
But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"
I remember last year all these bitches called me lame so I stopped the simping and pretended I was gay, now I think they're all fucking with me.
I'm an LGBTQ imposter got cut last year know I've made the roster and you may think I'm a monster. I'm just just tryna see some titties.
On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"
The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."
The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"
The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple gets picked.