Joke jokes
Q: How did Helen Keller get a concussion?
A: She kept stepping on a rake.
What do you call a black coconut?
A CoonConut.
What do you call a man with no hands? Clapless.
A cheetah and a lion are racing.
The cheetah wins.
The lion says, "You a cheetah!"
The cheetah replies, "Nah, you a lion!"
What do you call a woodpecker with no beak? A headbanger.
Therapist just mean the-rapist.
What do you call a girl who is thirsty for water?
An H2hoe.
So a girl says, "You're so ugly to me," and she says, "I’m the prettiest girl." I say, "Yeah, a pretty girl for an ogre 👹!"
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Students: "Meat."
Teacher: "Very good. Now what does the pig give you?"
Students: "Bacon."
Teacher: "And finally, what does the fat cow give you?"
One of the students: "Homework!"
An astronomer walked up to me and I was like, "Give me some space..."
Are you getting the funnies?
This guy tried to kill me, and I asked, "What is this? Friday the Thirteenth?" Michael replied, "Nah, it's Halloween."
I was gonna tell a rumor about butter, but I don’t want to spread it.
Oofer.
"Bippidy boppidy boo! Bill Cosby is coming for you!"
What did the cow say to the fat pig?
Moooooooove over!
What do you call a baby potato?
Small fry!
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
No Body Knows.
No body nose.
"I asked my friend what his height is?" He answered, "I'm sans'sational!"
How many Russians does it take to change a light bulb?
I don't know, they just keep Putin them in.
What’s worse than Sally in one trash can?
Sally in 13 trash cans.