Joke jokes
Q: Why did the family want to move out while the neighbors were playing tennis?
A: Because they were a racquet!
Q. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A. A gummy bear.
Q. What monster plays the most April Fools' pranks?
A. Prankenstein.
I left Iran. Guess how? I ran!
What do you call a 6 year old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
Wanna hear a joke?
Me.
What noise did Steven Hawking make when he died?
Windows shutting down.
You want a joke? My entire existence.
How do you scare a bee?
Boo-bee!
What did the shoe say to the other shoe?
Nothing, it was tied up in another conversation.
They say I’m sliced like the apples in a kids meal.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Dishes."
"Dishes who?"
"Dishes a bad joke."
Why did the roster cross the road twice?
To prove it was not a chicken.
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
What do you do with a dead scientist?
You barium.
What side of the sidewalk do crazy people walk on? The psych-o-path.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? He didn't have any BODY to go with.
Why would a dead guy lie?
Because he can't stand up.
Why did the one-armed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Yo man, stand up.
*short person stands*
No, seriously man, stand up!