Joke

Joke jokes

Hobby

It is reported that when Churchill met Stalin at Yalta, they discussed their hobbies.

Churchill said: "I collect the jokes people tell me about me."

"That's a coincidence," said Stalin, "I collect the people who tell jokes about me."

Eagle

Why is the eagle a bird with many skills? Because it’s talon-ted!

Hammer

If someone with a lisp dropped a hammer on their foot, would they be Thor?

Grape

What did the grape say when the Meerkat stepped on it?

It said nothing, just let out a little wine.

Turtle

Why was the turtle looking at her phone?

She wanted to take a shellfie.

Knock knock

Today I told my sis, "Knock knock."

She said, "Who's there?"

I said, "I Eat eat my mop."

She said, "I eat mop poo instead of who."

Chicken

Knock, knock. Who's there? Susan. Susan who? Season your chicken, it's too plain!

Thanos

SPOILER ALERT...

I was going to tell you a joke about Thanos, but T. S. snapped it away!

Traffic

Has anybody heard of the guy who passed out in the middle of oncoming traffic? Yeah, he was tired.

Tree

It's not surprising there isn't a whole lot of good tree jokes.

Most foresters have a wooden personality.

Baguette

A boy asks a zookeeper, "Why is there a baguette in a cage?"

The zookeeper says, "It's bread in captivity!"

Mat

What do you call a man that has no arms, no legs, and sits in front of your door? Mat.