Joke jokes
You look good now, but you’d look better hanging from my ceiling. ;)
What do you call a person on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels!
A father bought his depressed son a new house, and then pointing at it, he said, "Hang in there, son!"
What's an Asian's favorite food place?
Answer: Petco
What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?
Only one moans when I put my meat in it.
Have you played the game Imagine Dragons? Imagine draggin' deez nuts!
Why do teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups?
Because they can't even.
What did the suicidal guy say to his audience?
What did the suicidal guy say to his audience?
My grandfather said my generation relies too much on technology. So I unplugged his life support. (ref)
What's an orphan's favorite game?
"Who's your daddy?"
(Go look up the game)
Hey, did you hear about the kidnapping?
"No."
Yeah, but then he woke up.
Why can't emos stand in chairs?
Because they never get down.
They call me an elevator because I let people down.
The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.
Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?
In case they get a hole in one!
Why are half the orphans missing? Because I took them, of course! :]
What do you call a gay man with a thicc ass?
Fruit cake.
Why did the emo kid like the all black Oreos?
'Cause they're dark.
What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?”
Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.