Joke jokes
I would tell a dad joke, but it already left me.
If Germany is the father land, and Russia is the mother land, would WWII just be domestic violence?
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
What do you call a cow in the snow?
Chilli Beef.
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
One depressed kid goes to high-five a tree, but the tree just left him hanging.
Q. What's the most musical bone?
A. The trom-bone!
I see you guys have SANS-ational jokes!
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.
I’m just kidding.
Q: How can you tell if a vampire is sick?
A: By how much he's coffin.
What do Greek people never want to have on their food? Grease.
What did one copper say to the other? C U.
What did the bee say after the execution? "The criminal has been beeheaded!"
It is reported that when Churchill met Stalin at Yalta, they discussed their hobbies.
Churchill said: "I collect the jokes people tell me about me."
"That's a coincidence," said Stalin, "I collect the people who tell jokes about me."
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
Whenever I see a dog video, I just take a second to press paws.
Wanna hear a joke about corn?
Never mind, it's too corny.
What is a frog's favorite drink?
Croaka-cola!