Joke jokes
"I don't want to go on my at-home history."
- My friend, anon 2019.
What do you call two Michael J. Fox's standing next to each other?
Parallel Parkinson's.
What did a comedian say at a show full of blind people?
"What's up?"
One day, this dad and his son went to a basketball factory, and the son said, "I want to buy some balls." The dad said, "What for?" The son said, "So you can have some balls."
Take it in the ear day? More like take it in the rear day.
God better hope they got an elevator to Heaven.
Did you hear about the needle and thread shop?
Never mind, it was needle-ess.
A blind old guy asked me if I had any money to spare. I laughed and said I had a gold tooth.
I don't have any now.
Wanna hear a paper joke? Nvm, it's terrible.
What do you call a pig doing a karate chop?
What do you call a bear with no ears? A b.
Yeah, that joke was unbearable.
Why did the camel cross the road?
Because it wanted to get to the bright green grass.
Two pencils walking down the street.
Which one hasn’t got AIDS?
The one with the rubber on.
Why can't blondes make ice?
They forgot the recipe.
Q: What's yellow and can't swim?
A: A school bus full of children.
"Hi, my name is Robert. I have no life. Even my PS4 username is gay lil_bama."
My friend said to me, "How do you spell Tom?" and I said, "T-O-M-M." He said, "That's not how you spell 'it's Tom.' You have to take out one 'M'."
So I said, "But which one?"
What time is it when you smell garbage? Time to run!
What’s red and bad for your dental health? A brick.
What’s invisible and bad for you to breathe? Mustard gas.
What’s green and bad for you to drink? Radioactive waste.
Q: Why couldn't the queer wist eating his hot dog?
A: Because it tasted like shit.