If you read this, your life is a joke.
Joke Jokes
I'd tell you a joke about unemployed people, but none of them work.
I was going to make a 9/11 joke, but I'm afraid it will crash and burn.
1: I wish my cancer could kill me quicker so I don't have to do this class anymore.
2: I'm dying, finally.
3: I'm sorry, I can't go to your party because I'm expected to be dead by then.
On a serious note, I might actually have cancer and I'm getting checks. I hope for the best :/
Three people having sex is a threesome; two people is a twosome. So next time someone calls you "handsome," don't take it as a compliment.
A man was hitting a woman with his d*ck. Someone ran up to the man and said, "That's domestic violence!" The man replied with, "No, it's not domestic violence, it's dumbass-d*ck violence!"
I would have told you about a chemistry joke, but I wouldn't get a reaction.
What's fast and almost got away?
A Mexican jumping the border.
My life, there, that was the joke.
What do you call a hot Mac Book Pro?
A Mac Daddy Pro.
How do you get a Pikachu on a bus?
You poke it on.
You want a joke? My entire existence.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Well, neither did she!
What do you call a fish that smokes? "A puffer."
I'd make a joke about Noble Gases, but I probably wouldn't get much of a reaction.
I got a joke.
Allahu Akbar!
Why do you go to the bank?
To get money.
When do you run from the bank?
When the cops come.
A wife and husband were setting up their computer, and the husband made the password "my dick." But the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.
I'd make 9/11 jokes, but they'd just crash and burn.
A bear is like your best mate, Harry.
If you stab them, they die from a stab wound.