Joke jokes
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.
I wish my grass was edgy...
then it would cut itself...
Why do female parachutists have to wear tampons before they jump?
So they don't whistle on the way down!
Alright, I'm gonna make like a tree and leaf.
*****You have to leave right after you tell this joke.****
Why did only blonds show up at Saturday's party during the Corona crisis?
Because their computers flashed, "Virus blocked!"
If a midget walks up to you and tells you your hair smells nice, is that sexual harassment?
What is shark's favorite day?
Chewsday.
A man walks into a library.
Man: "Hello ma'am, do you know where I can find a book on suicide?"
Librarian: "Do you know about our return policy?"
Suicidal Man: ...
Librarian: ...
The Woman checking out a book: "WHAT THE FUCK?"
Time for you to stop looking at jokes on worstjokesever.com and go to bed!
How come the toilet paper could not make it across the road?
Because of the Corona Virus.
What's the definition of rude?
Sticking a blind man in a corner and telling him to find his wife.
All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.
I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.
Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"
Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."
Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."
Dad: "Exactly, son."
The F in orphan stands for family... oh wait.
What's a depressed kid's favorite holiday?.... Christmas because everything is hanging.
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he was a cow-herd!
What is Green and Red and goes round and round?
A frog in a blender.
(this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)
What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?
One can support an average family.
Why did Leah throw the butter out of the window? To see a butterfly!
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To get to the rear end.
What is the German word for constipation? Farfrompoopin.