Joke jokes
What's the definition of rude?
Sticking a blind man in a corner and telling him to find his wife.
All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.
I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.
Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"
Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."
Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."
Dad: "Exactly, son."
The F in orphan stands for family... oh wait.
What's a depressed kid's favorite holiday?.... Christmas because everything is hanging.
Why was the cow afraid?
Because he was a cow-herd!
What is Green and Red and goes round and round?
A frog in a blender.
(this next one is pretty bad, and I don't mean it, so don't get offended)
What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench?
One can support an average family.
Why did Leah throw the butter out of the window? To see a butterfly!
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To get to the rear end.
What is the German word for constipation? Farfrompoopin.
What does one piece of toilet paper say to the other?
"I'm wiped!"
Have you heard about the awesome fruit race?
The lettuce was ahead, but the tomato was able to ketchup!
What did the salad dressing say to the tomato?
"Don't look! I'm dressing!"
What did one tampon say to the other tampon?
Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches!
Sadly, blind jokes are cruel. A kid at my school was punched the other day for being blind.
Sadly, he didn't see it coming.
Wanna me to show you a joke?
*Points at face* Funny, right?
What is the healthiest fruit?
An orange 🍊—It takes Vitamin See!
Why couldn’t the midget ride the bus?
He can’t slam dunk his bus fare!
What did the Asian say to the Asian?
*Cough*
What did the poop say to the toilet paper? “You’re on a roll!”