Joke jokes
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked.
What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.
A 14 year old girl finds out she is pregnant. Her: "Crap! My mom is going to kill me!"
The fetus: "lol same here."
Wanna hear a joke? Women have no rights!
What's the same about a newborn and a football?
You can kick them both very easily.
Not a joke?
More like not an existing organism in life.
What do you call a group of depressed people? The Suicide Squad.
What's the difference between a snowman and a snow woman?
Snowballs!
I don't like making Kobe jokes... they always crash and burn.
Some jokes are best left not harassed by those who are offended by them.
For I have everyone's IP address.
It's not funny to joke about orphans. Without any education, they'd never understand what the jokes mean.
It isn't funny to joke about 9/11. The jokes tend to crash and burn.
I'm sorry my jokes are so bad.
A priest sees a man about to commit suicide. The man says, "I have nothing to live for here. I will die, go to Heaven, and get 72 virgins." Then the priest says, "No need for this. I will take you to the local elementary school."
I was about to tell a 9/11 joke, but it was too plane.
Say this to your significant other (or your weird friends!)
Are you an unsafe staircase? 'Cause you look like you could use a railing.
I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"
I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3
Why did the chicken say to the football guy, "You quarter?"
Why does Michael Jackson like twenty-eight year olds?
'Cause there are twenty of them.
How did 10 die?
Because it was in between 9 and 11.