Joke jokes
You know it’s called the circle of life? Because there’s no point to it.
What kind of tea is really hard to swallow? Reality.
If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I’d be broke.
How do you know when a joke has turned into a dad joke?
When it leaves you and never comes back.
What do a crippled person's legs and the Twin Towers have in common? They both went down and never came back up.
What did one orphan say to the other orphan?
"Robin! Jump in the Batmobile."
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.
Why can't Michael Jackson come within 500 meters of a school?
Because he's dead. 😁
What’s a lesbian’s favorite Pokemon? Squirtle.
Bully: I can't understand you because I don't speak ugly language.
Me: And I don't speak idiot language.
I can tell you used to be friends with your hairline, cuz it goes way back.
This is not a joke, Tom. I'm asking you to leave me alone, stop being sexual, I don't like you.
911 jokes usually go over my head.
Then it hits me.
My grandpa said my generation relies too much on technology.
Then I unplugged his life support. :)
Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure?"
That's a horrible thing to find out when you're adopted.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 is a registered 6 offender.
Say this when you answer a spam call...
"Hi, welcome to Bob's Taco Shack and Funeral Home, where yesterday's grief is today's beef."
A plane is about to crash into the ocean, and the passengers are freaking out.
A woman stands up, takes off her clothes, and says, "Before I go, is there a man man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, takes off his shirt, and says, "Here, iron this!"
Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.
Orphan: How come?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
Orphan: . . . .
My cousin is in a wheelchair and wanted to battle.
So I went up a step and said, "It's over Anakin, I have the high ground!"