A Lew runs into a wall, what does he break? His Nose.
A Mexican runs into a wall, what does he break? His lawn mower.
Joke Jokes
What do you call a private nun?
Nun-o-yo-business.
What did the grape say when he got squished? Nothing, he just let out a little wine.
Hey, I'm not forcing you to learn the Force.
Joke.
Did you hear about the mad who got his whole left side cut off? He's all right now.
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
I cry when I chop an onion.
How long does it take for 10 dead babies to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.
Why didn't the kid cancer patients like his joke?
He said, "You'll understand when you get older!"
Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it... at least Jesus didn't get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.
I don't have a joke about Christianity.
I don't want to get crucified.
A man went to a Ford dealership hoping to find a car, but he said they weren't affordable.
Penis.
A bully chokes me. I simply say, "Joke's on you, I like being choked!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh---
MOOOO!
I threw a Asian down some stairs. It was Wong on so many levels.
What do you call an octopus dad?
An octodad.
How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
5
4 to turn the table, and 1 to hold the bulb.
what's the difference between an onion and a baby?
nobody cries when you cut up the baby.
How does a blonde turn off the light after having sex?
She opens the car door.