Joke jokes
What did the penis say to its pee?
"Urine."
Two people walk down the road. One says to the other, "Mitch, we passed Weight Watchers 2 minutes ago." He responds, "Jake, the noodle shop is just here. You've been carrying that sh*t on your head for 14 years!"
If you are going to make fun of someone, make fun of orphans. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Double whammy.
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer, it never gets old.
Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms.
What did Sarah get for Christmas? I dunno, she hasn't opened it yet.
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Sarah.
What bounces up and down at 100 miles per hour?
A baby tied to the back of a pick up truck.
Why is 6 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9.
"Guess how I got to Germany so fast?"
"Because I was Russian!"
Why did the doorbell have a good sense of humor?
Because it got everybody's pokes!
Joke: Why did the gym close down?
– It just didn’t work out.
What do you call two Mexicans in a sleeping bag?
A Twix.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender said, "Why the long face?"
Your face is a joke.
What do you call a kid watching Star Wars by themselves?
Hans Solo.
My mom said, "Take out the trash," and I said, "Okay." The next day she asked, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "In line to get crushed."
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
What's worse than Sally in a trash can? Sally in thirteen trash cans.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotofpuss.
Why wasn’t the duck afraid to cross the road? Because he wasn’t chicken!
What are the similarities between an American teen and an old Muslim man?
They both choose who they want.
Did you know Hellen Keller has a pool?
Neither did she.
A farmer walks up to his farmer neighbor with a jug of milk. The farmer says, "I milked your cow." The neighbor replies, "I have a bull, not a cow."