Why couldn't the skeleton go to the prom? Because he had no BODY to go with...
I could have said a skeleTON more jokes, but I think that might break your funny bone.
Joke Jokes
What's the difference between a paycheck and your penis?
You don't have to beg your wife to blow up the paycheck.
Why couldn't Bob hang himself?
Because he had no arms to tie a knot. :'-)
What do you call a nine year old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
Friend: How dark is your humor?
Me: It gets beat by the cops on a daily basis.
Hey, did you hear about the cat revolution? It was a cat-astrophy! I guess we just have to stay PAWSitive!
Stop with the dead baby jokes. We're running out of babies.
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An 80-year-old blind man asks his grandson, "Can you grab my glasses?"
Then the grandson says, "Did you get in the flour again?"
Grandpa said, "No, it was the weed."
What's the best part about having emo grass?
It cuts itself!
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre.
Why is 7 afraid of 6?
Because 7 is a vegetarian and 6 is a cannibal.
What's the difference between an onion and a baby?
One makes you cry when you cut it up.
I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.
Q: What do you call a cow with only two legs?
A: Lean meat.
What did the frog say to the pedophile?
What did the maxi pad say to the fart? "You are the wind beneath my wings."
What is the smallest room in the world?
A mushroom.
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
Ever since I needed a wheelchair, my husband has been so rude. He’s been pushing me around and talking behind my back.