And God said to John, "Come forth and you shall be granted eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
3 rednecks Billy,Joe and John talk about they hobbies, they agree shooting. John says i like shooting animals. Joe says I like shooting birds. Billy says I like shooting cans. Joe and John ask "what kind of can like bear cans, pepsi cans or cola cans". Billy respond Africans, Mexicans, Jamaicans and Asian Americans.
So Fred accidentally cut off John's ear with his spade. John and Fred were digging a ditch when Fred made a careless swipe with his spade and cut off John's ear.
"Help me find it in all this mud," said John. "If we find it they can sew it back on."
After a couple of minutes, Fred triumphantly shouted, "Here it is", handing the ear to John.
"That's not it," said John, throwing the ear back into the muddy ditch. "Mine had a pencil behind it."
Man: Cow milk is drinkable Other man: How do you know that? Man: *smiles with milk all over mouth* Other man: John...h-how do you know that!
John and Chloe are in school arguing about who has the more heroic grandfather. Chloe says "My grandfather killed 50 Nazis, he's so heroic" John says "So what? My grandfather KILLED Hitler"
John cena
Your so bent and ugly that you'd make Elton John go straight
βYour mother has been with us for 20 years,β said John. βIsnβt it time she got a place of her own?β βMy mother?β replied Helen. βI thought she was your mother.β
John F. Kennedy may rest in pieces
Why did John rape his mother? Because he wanted a brother to play Mario Kart with.
"Hey I heard you were a bit dow- where's John?" "He died" "oh I'm so sorry but I got you food " (after they eat) "Hey how did John taste seasoned and cooked.?"
One day I went to talk to my friend. "Hi John!" I said. No response. "Oh yea." I went to pick up the remote and clicked the unmute button. "Hope that helps."
John Lennon: What a nice view
John walked outside.
He got shot
:skull:
What do you call a spanish toilet. Elton John
john walk into pat at the barn he was dancing nacked in front of a tractor john said hey pat what you doing pat said well me and the wife have been having a bit of trouble in bed so I went to a therapist and he said I should do something sexy to a tractor (attract her)
John kreeses forehead broke when silver hit ββem in the forehead
