it's jokes
You know how 7 ate 9? Why was 10 scared? It's because he was in the middle of 9/11. 🤣
Isn't it strange that the LGBTQ flag only has straight lines?
Is it just me, or are magnets really attractive?
I almost had a joke about Parkinson's disease, but I was too shaken up to say it.
What did the pillow say as it fell off the bed?
Oh sheet!
Damn it I discovered digital art. Made this for my laptop lockscreen 😂 I drew the panda btw
What is purple and whines when it’s squished?
A bunch of grapes! 🍇😂
How do you get 4 gay guys on a bar stool? You turn it upside down.
How do you get them back off again? You jerk them off.
Q: what happened when the depressed kid wanted to high five the tree?
A: It left him/her/them hanging.
I was gonna tell a self harm joke, but realized it would cause too much pain.
For boys, life is a lot like a penis: simple, soft, straight, relaxed, and hanging freely......... then a woman makes it really hard.😩😉😏
Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!
What's the difference between a mosquito and a blonde? The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
A proud new dad sits down with his own father.
His father says, "Son, you now have a child of your own, so I think it's time I gave you this." And so, he pulls out a book: 1001 Dad Jokes.
The young man says, "Dad, I'm honored," as tears well up in his eyes.
His father says, "Hi, Honored, I'm Dad."
Man asking waitress, "Pardon me, miss, may I ask you about the menu, please?"
Waitress, "It's none of your business about the men I please!"
Why do orphans become criminals? Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
Knock knock... Who's there? It's Jesus, let me in... Why? I have to save you... From what? From what I'm gonna do to you if you don't let me in.
An apple a day keeps a doctor away... at least if you throw it hard enough.
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.
This is how my mom always threatens me: "I brought you into this world, I can bring you out of it too." That's why I only have 2 siblings left.
I wonder where the bodies are?
I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears, people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that.