it's jokes
Why did the cellphone get glasses? Because it lost its contacts!
Your hairline's so ugly it made Michael Jackson lean back.
A suicidal customer walks into a gun store.
Cashier: Is this your final purchase?
Customer: Actually, yes it is!
I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.
Wanted to go to the zoo, it was too packed, so I went to KFC instead. Their monkey enclosure is better anyway.
Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?
They hate it when you hand it to them.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?
I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.
How are corpses like pools?
Once you get in, it's only cold for like a minute.
To stop my password from getting hacked, I changed it to something difficult to crack: "StrongBrazilianNut111".
I wish death was in the form of a woman.
That way, it would never come for me.
How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a tampon and ask him what period it came from.
Have you heard of the current event in Africa?
It’s known as the Hunger Games.
Why did I give an orphan the iPhone X?
Because it is the first one without a home button.
COVID is like fashion...
We started hearing about it in Italy...
Became popular in LA and NYC...
Florida ignored it...
And it was all made in China in the end.
What do you call it when you choose Panera Bread over something else?
Panera instead.
Your hairline is so long, people call it "The Natural Disaster!"
Your hairline is so long The Rock complimented it!
A piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh, Bunsen, my flame," the sodium swooned. "I melt whenever I see you!"
The Bunsen burner replied, "Calm down. It's just a phase you're going through."
What is the difference between white people and coal?
It’s bad for the environment to burn coal.
I was excited to hear Apple might start selling its own cars until I learned they wouldn’t support Windows.