it's jokes
You've probably heard this one before, but screw it.
What's the difference between Jesus Christ and the kid I just killed?
Jesus Christ probably died a virgin.
My friend asked me how fast my humor was, and I said it jumps borders. Then he asked how dark my humor is, and I said it picks cotton.
In honor of Michael Jackson, Starbucks is introducing the 'Jackson Latte'. It's 50 year old coffee, with 8 year old cream. Get it while supplies last.
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
It might take a while for me to get hard because I just got laid last night.
Little Johnny ran into the kitchen and asked his mother, "Mom, can little girls have babies?" His mom answered, "Of course not." A few minutes later, his mom heard him shout to his friend, "It's okay, we can keep playing!"
Have you heard of the Tic-Tac-Toe Beetle? It has an X-O-skeleton.
Why does the queen move more than a king on the chessboard?
Because it looks like a kitchen floor.
Being raped is like a dance; sometimes it hurts, sometimes it hurts more.
Me: Can I get your mom's number?
Friend: Here you go:
Me: Ohh, strange, I already had it.
When an orphan takes a selfie, it's a family photo.
You call it a burning orphanage. I call it FNAF lore.
Why’s it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl? You gotta drop the bomb twice.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.
What's so great about dead baby jokes? They never get old.
Why is Stephen Hawking going to hell?
Because it’s a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
What’s the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
9/11 wasn’t a terrorist attack, it was the world’s introduction to Sky Football
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either terrible news or great news.
Life is like giving head... it always sucks.
What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!
I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.