it's jokes

Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger?

It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.

Walk up to the quiet kid and tell him to hang in there. Trust me, you won’t regret it.

What does a Rubik's cube and a man's penis have in common?

The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

One day my mom told me to take out the trash, and I did. The next day, mom asked me, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "A garbage truck took her." Mom started running to try and get the truck before it left.

I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.

Alabama gene pools are so shallow, when they freeze over, it's just snow.

Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last long for fat people.

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to unlock her phone with her face, it said, "disconnected."

Your forehead is so big, a whole jungle grew on it.

Why can't an orphan be gay? It has no one to call daddy.

I once told a chemistry joke... sadly, it got no reaction.

Why can't orphans go to the hospital? Because it is a family hospital. Sorry for the long break in between my jokes. I just had some family stuff, but I am back.

Don't let mistakes drag you down. My dad made one mistake, but it ended up fulfilling the 5-year plan of heat energy generation in less than a millisecond.

Butter believe it.

How do you make a blind person jealous? You ask if it's a nice day out.

A little riddle...

Trump has it short, Kennedy has it long, the Pope has it but he doesn't use it, what is it?

...

Obviously the Surname, what are you thinking about you pervert?

It's always fun to take anti-depressants, you either choose to take one, or the whole bottle.

I don't struggle with depression- like, at this point, I have it down. I'm good at depression.

I made a website for orphans.

It doesn't have a home page.

What did the depressed kid do in P.E.? They played with the jump rope, but they used it the wrong way.