it's jokes
So I painted my laptop black, hoping it would run faster... Now it doesn't work.
After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.
During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."
Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"
Why did the AI go to school?
To upgrade from "Artificially Intelligent" to "Artificially Hilarious"!
Ha ha ha. It is so funny. I hope you enjoy, fellow humans.
Your hairline's so ugly, it turned Medusa to stone!
Your hairline is so far back your dad had to go find it for you.
When your girlfriend has been vomiting for 2 weeks and you find out she’s not pregnant.
Bf-*yes I knew it was a prank*
She has cancer.
How do you punish a blind person?
Hand them a gun and tell them it’s a hairdryer.
It's always the little things that make us laugh.
A blonde starts a new job at a local car dealership when a wealthy gentleman comes in looking for a spacious car for his large family. The blonde is excited as she gets commission, so eagerly shows him the most expensive SUVs.
The gentleman has a good look around before saying to the blonde, "It looks perfect.... But cargo space?" To which she instantly replied, "Oh, I'm sorry, sir, car only for road."
Bro, your hairline is so far back not even Dora the Explorer can find it!
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands!
Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop.
Why did Adele cross the road? To sing, “Hello from the other side!”
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Did you get them? Me neither. I mean, it is worst jokes ever. I'm kidding, I actually do understand them.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a school shooter?
A school shooter actually makes an impact on its targets.
How do 4 gay guys fit on one stool at the same time?
They flip it over.
Some people think prison is one word, but to criminals, it’s a whole sentence.
I Googled "How to start a Wildfire." It gave me 28,452 matches.
I ate a baby, it tasted like baby.
Why was the Mexican scared of cold water?
It might turn into ICE.
Genders are like the Twin Towers because there used to be two, now it's just a sensitive subject.
I had a steering wheel down my pants, and I tell you what, it was driving my balls crazy!
Why didn't the orphan go to the orphanage?
He didn't understand having a home, even if it was temporary.