it's jokes
What stresses a baby strawberry out?
When its mom is in a jam.
When does a computer function best? When it listens to its motherboard.
How did the digital clock show off to its mother?
Look, Ma, no hands!
What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?
"I'm not a-moosed right now."
Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook!
I have a joke about chemistry, but I don't think it will get a reaction.
What's it like to have the best daughter in the world? You'll have to ask grandma!
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
A bowling ball doesn't cry when you put your fingers in it.
Why do Chinese people like playing Among Us?
It’s the only place they can vote!
Riddle me this, Batman, what's long, round, and has cum in the middle?
Batman: A dick.
Riddler: NO NO NOOO! It's a cucumber!
Your cut [is] so broke, even Bob the Builder can't fix it.
Why was the leper hockey game canceled?
It was because of a face-off in the corner.
Someone on here said it previously:
My fondest childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather. That is until my mom took the urn away from me.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter; it ain’t coming to you.
How do Americans learn the metric system?
9mm at a time. The problem is sometimes it goes straight through their heads.
Want to know how you make any salad into a Caesar salad?
Stab it twenty-three times.
It’s important to establish a good vocabulary.
If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.
My husband left a note on the fridge that said, "This isn't working." I'm not sure what he's talking about. I opened the fridge door and it's working fine!
"Wanna hear a joke about paper? Never mind—it's tearable."
We say “Father, I have sinned,” because it would be weird if we said, “Daddy, I have sinned,” right?
“Forgive me, Daddy, for my transgressions!” We say the “Our Father,” not the “Our Daddy.”